Build A Life of Resilience

We all desire resilience, but as I hear so often, many of us don't really know what resilience is or how to achieve it. Well, here are a few thoughts.

Resilience is the capacity to rebound from life's trials and tribulations, strengthened by the circumstances, and better equipped to live fully, love deeply, and weather future crises with poise. Resilience helps us to see that difficulties need not leave us eternally damaged; only temporarily challenged.

Want to build resilience? Try these seve sure-fire practices:

1. Cultivate Patience: Patience isn't about "sucking up" adversity and tolerating misery. Rather it is about learning to grow in peace with life's mysteries and uncertainties, and to endure through moderation and perspective. Remind yourself that the same life that gives you pain, also gives you joy.



2. Make Meaning: Discover for yourself, not demand from others or from life itself, how to make sense of and find significance in life. Life is a constant play of dark and light, but within each aspect there is a kernel of sacred truth; in other words something meaningful and worthwhile that can carry you forward and help you to be well. Find that kernel, and hold onto it with everything you have. For this is the seed of hope that will carry you to a better tomorrow.



3. Love and Connect: Resilience does not come about by trying to "be brave," "solider on," or "go it alone." Rather it is fostered by supportive relationships. Reach out and let others in during difficult times, even when everything inside you wants to hide from the world. Allow yourself to love and be loved, and to show appreciation and compassion even in the midst of adversity.



4. Forgive and Reconcile: Adversity often fills us with rage and makes us feel resentful. What's more it can separate us from those we care about. Look to rebuild personal relationships or reestablish communications with those from whom your are estranged by forgiving. And look for ways to restore a bond of faith in yourself, others, and the world around you through reconciling what was with what is, and opening yourself up to what can be going forward.



5. Express Your Self: Self-expression is the greatest example of the human spirit in action! Harness your inner voice and vision through your imagination, creativity, resourcefulness, ideas and humor. At the end of each day, ask yourself, "What did I choose to do today that set my spirit ablaze? What did I create that used the best parts of me? What did I make my spirit available to today that contributed to my own life, the lives of others, or the world around me?"



6. Master Your Self: One of life's hard truths is that no matter how much we try, we can't always control what happens to us or those we care about. But one of the great things about life is that we can always be in command of ourselves no matter what life throws our way. Learn to struggle well by being mindful and taking ownership of your feelings, thoughts, and actions at all possible moments, and by following your own moral compass. Remind yourself that you always have a choice in how to respond to any given circumstance.
7. Build Dynamic Balance: Adversity often makes us worry about the past, nervous about the future, and inflexible in the present. Become a tree in the wind--try to maintain an engaged and supple sense of time, finding coherence and worth in all aspects of life. When you do, you will be more about to adjust with confidence and hopw through changing situations and conditions.
   

And this is only the beginning!! If you want to learn more about building a life of resilience, check out my new book Stirred Not Shaken.

Remember, we cannot recreate our lives going backward. We can only reclaim our life moving forward.

Understanding Spirit

Let me come straight to the point: like an idea, an opinion, a personality, or a dream, everyone has spirit, no matter what our background or belief. But with our busy, modern lives, few of us know what spirit really is, let alone how to use it in order to help us be healthy and well. Well I have three words for you: not any more!

Spirit is really very simple to understand: spirit is the energy that animates us and directs us toward who we really are and what we most desire to do. It is that aspect of each of us that lies beyond all harmful fear and ego and seeks to satisfy what I call the Six Fundamental Human Desires: Meaning, Purpose, Value, Connec­tion, Resilience, and Transcendence (broadly defined). Whether we are spiritually or secularly inclined, this is something we can all agree on. Everything beyond this—our be­liefs and principles, our rituals and practices, and our identity and community—is simply a matter of expression.

Physical wellness and mental wellness are absolutely essential to our health and well-being because they help us to literally stay alive and function day to day. But as we all know only too well, eventually the body and mind will wither, and unfortunately sometimes sooner than we may wish. Only our spirit deepens and grows with time and circumstance…if we let it, and allows us to flourish in the face of any and all of life’s circumstances. Therefore, spirit wellness—what you might call “living with spirit”—is also an incredibly important part of life, because it helps sustain us everyday, come what may; moreover, it gives us what we all ultimately long for—happiness, hope, wholeness, and peace.

So to all the people who ask me, “How do I really make spirit a part of my wellness routine?” this Blog is your answer. I’ll give you practical and profound ways to increase Spirit Wellness and Self Health for all aspects of life. And rest assured it is for anyone of any background or belief. Why should you trust your precious spirit to me? First, because I’ve spent more than a decade formally studying the world’s great wisdom traditions, both spiritual and secular, looking for insights and answers and earned threes and two certificates; and as a result I created a framework specifically for it called Spiritful Living. Second, because I’ve lived it and you can too! (Want to know more? Click here!)